


Never hide yourself

by Magichemistry



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-23
Updated: 2018-02-23
Packaged: 2019-03-22 14:34:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13766187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magichemistry/pseuds/Magichemistry
Summary: Request: Hello! I'd like to request a Kylo x reader fic where the reader is his apprentice and has a massive crush on him and that causes her trouble to concentrate during training. He knows the whole time, just doesn't let her know. Also Kylo is under lots of stress because of his inner conflict and he has a breakdown. She comforts him and tells him he's not the monster everyone sees him as, that he shouldn't be blaming himself for what he did. Please can it contain LOTS OF FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF thank you





	Never hide yourself

"Master, am I doing it correct?" you ask as you lift with the Force Kylo's lightsaber.

"Yes, (Y/N), keep concentrate, don’t let it fall" Kylo encourages you. You’re not supposed to be toying with his weapon but you like it so much and you concentrate better with it he let is pass. He's so proud of you, you've only been training for six months but you're already really skillful. "If you keep up like this, soon I'll help you build your own lightsaber" Kylo says.

You let the lightsaber fall into the floor, distracted by Kylo's comment. "Really? Will it look as cool as yours?" you smile at him. Kylo's heart misses to beat when you see that smile.

The memory dissolves on Kylo's mind. He knows the massive crush you have for him, but he doesn’t have only an innocent crush for you. Oh no, somehow you crept into his heart and now he can’t think about anything but you.

But he know what he is, he knows the atrocious acts he has committed throughout his life, starting when he was a teenager at the Jedi temple. How can someone like you be with someone like him? It'll never work. He'd end up crushing your heart and destroying your life. Because that is what he knows to do. Destroying the lives of the important people in his life. Talent he acquired since he was a child he thinks bitterly.

Why Kylo's life is plagued of conflicts? But he's the master, he can’t be tempted. He has a plan. He'll make sure your crush for him disappears. You’ll thank him later.

* * *

 

"Vacations are over" Kylo says as soon as he walks in to the training room. You're a little surprised but you nod, ready to start training.

You start with hand to hand combat, after an hour your whole body aches, your nose is bleeding and you're covered in sweat. This day has been the hardest and Kylo hasn’t show sign to stop.

"Master, can we take a break?" you beg him, not sure how long you can take his beating.

"Do you think your enemy will give you a break when you're at war? Uh?" another punch from Kylo lands into your ribs, leaving you suffocated and on the floor.

"Pathetic" he looks down at you and you frown your face from the pain. "Let's meditate, seeing you're useless at combat."

You wince a little when you sit into a meditation position, your body hurts and your heart beats fast. Kylo sits in front of you and he instructs you "Try to see what's on my mind. Break my barriers and the training will be over for today".

You're determined to fulfill your commitment, and not because you want to have a break but to make your Master feel proud. You close your eyes and breath deeply, trying to put your mind in blank. You search for Kylo through the Force and you're immediately inside his mind. "That's weird" you think. Until now you have never been able to achieve it, but you concentrate more, hopeful that today is the day.

Memories you have seen start playing in your mind, but this time you're seeing them from another point of view. Kylo's view. You can see yourself smiling with adoration to Kylo, longing for his attention, sighing for him, your cheeks flushing when he gives you a compliment. Wait ... if you're seeing this, that means he knows.

You open your eyes and Kylo is looking at you, smirking.

"You ... you know?" You mumble, your face turning red.

"What? That you have a crush on me? Well, (Y/N), you don’t need the Force to know it. I mean, everyone in this ship already knows how much you like me, like a silly puppy following its  master" he says with all the disgust and contempt he’s capable of.

Tears peek through your eyes and you're too embarrassed to say something. Kylo gets up from the floor adding "But hey, at least your earn your rest for today". Then he walks out of the training room, leaving you alone.

* * *

 

It's been three days since Kylo has seen his student (Y/N), regrets fill his body but he knows he did it because she doesn’t deserve being with a monster like him. Monster, funny how you hear enough times an insult and you end up believing it.

He arrives to a dark room that has a bridge and a good view of the vast space. There's no use for this room, it just serves to connect two big zones in the ship. But it's quiet here and no one's around. It's exactly what Kylo needs.

He leans his forearms in the barandal and his gaze gets lost in the space. "Master?" a voice scares him, almost making him lose balance.

"Shit, (Y/N), you scared me" he turns around searching for you, it's dark but he can see you hidden on a corner.

"Sorry" you say ashamed.

"What are you doing here? Why didn’t I feel you?" when he got to this room he made sure there was no one. He didn’t feel anything alive on the Force so he supposed he was alone.

"Sometimes when I want to be alone or I'm sad I can hide my Force signature. I learned how to do it when I was a kid" you explain as you get up from the floor and walk to the railing next to Kylo.

"And do you want to be alone or are you sad right now?" Kylo inquiries.

"Both" you look down. Kylo doesn’t need to ask the reason why are you feeling down, he knows it perfectly.

He frowns thinking what to say when your voice interrupts his thoughts. "Master, I'm really sorry that my feelings for you have meddled in my training".

After the rude and horrible way he treated you, you're not mad at him, you think you're the one who should apologize. "No, (Y/N), it's me who owes you an apology. I never had to treat you like that”.

"What's wrong, Master?" you touch his arm, sensing his distress.

"I came here because I wanted to be alone too" he said hoping you don’t think he wants you to leave. He's just trying to explain what's happening.

"Why?" you ask sadly.

"I hear what everyone thinks about me, everytime I pass through people all I can hear is the word monster" his lip quivers, feeling his chest constricted.

"Maybe they see you as a monster, but not me. I see you for who you are. I see you" you assure him, holding his hand.

"I killed my father"

"No family is perfect"

"My mother hates me"

"We are all the disappointment of our parents" you shrug.

"You really like me, don’t you?" he smiles sadly. He can’t comprehend how you can still like him after everything he has done.

"Sorry" you feel embarrassed again.

"Stop saying sorry" he chastises with you.

"So ..." but before you can apology again Kylo grabs your face and crushes his mouth against yours, looking for that kiss that he so desperately wants. You kiss him in return and he pushes you closer to him taking you by the waist. You breath fast, wanting to absorb all you can from him, a few moans come from the two of you, melting into the kiss. You feel his tongue rubbing yours and you give him full access to your mouth.

When the kiss is over he rests his forehead against yours and whispers "Never, listen to me, never hide yourself again. You're wonderful, (Y/N)”.

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi to me: tumblr.com/bad--bad--man


End file.
